Confessions of a Happy Hoe - Why My Job is the Tits (Literally)

Hello internet friends!

Yes, I’m a sex worker. No, I don’t hate myself. Yes, I pay my taxes (shocking, I know). And guess what? I’m actually really happy doing what I do. Like, sing-in-the-shower, twirl-in-my-lingerie, smile-at-strangers happy.

You see, when people think of sex work, they often imagine a grim black-and-white documentary with lots of sad piano music. Meanwhile, here I am sipping an a cup of tea in a face mask on, comfy over sized T shirt and slippers, planning my Halloween outfit which happens to be a Chucky doll (a sexy one)

So, let me tell you why being a sex worker is actually kind of awesome.

1. I Set My Own Hours (no boring 9-5)
My office hours are whenever I feel hot and caffeinated which is most of the time let’s be real. Morning start? Sure. Midnight start? Why not

Flexibility is the real luxury here. Need a mental health day? Done. Want to visit your bestie mid-week or enjoy the beautiful weather and take my dog to the beach … absolutely! Having the freedom to set my own hours but also still have the structure of a roster is definitely a blissful feeling.

2. The Work Uniform is Incredible
Forget blazers and boring grey or beige. My work wardrobe includes a nice pair of heels, sexy lingerie, stunning stand out dresses and the occasional fishnets.

Of course there’s the requests for something a little outside the box (which I absolutely invite).

3. The People Are Hilarious
My clients? A delightful buffet of humanity. Some are sweet, some are spicy, and some just want to talk about Star Trek while I show them my feet. I’ve seen more role-play than an improv troupe, and honestly, I should be getting an Oscar at this point.

Also: I’ve never met a fellow sex worker who wasn’t smart, funny, and ready with lube AND life advice. We are the Swiss army knives of emotional intelligence, and bonds can be made with people we have the chance to learn about and love, that maybe everyday life wouldn’t give the opportunity.

4. Sex Positivity!
Being a sex worker has taught me more about communication, consent, and confidence than any self-help book ever could. I know my boundaries, I know my worth, and I’m not afraid to say “no,” “yes,” or “only if you tip first’.

Plus, talking openly about bodies and pleasure Is liberating.

5. I Make People Happy (And That’s Kind of Beautiful)
Whether it’s a lonely person feeling seen, a couple rekindling the spark, or someone discovering a kink they never knew they had (degradation and humiliation, anyone?), I get to bring joy, connection, and good vibes—sometimes battery-operated ones—into people’s lives.

That’s not shameful.. it’s wonderful

Final Thought: It's Not Everyone’s Cup of Tea (But I’m Someone’s Triple Espresso)
Sex work isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay. But for me? It’s empowering, hilarious, profitable, and filled with unexpected moments of real human connection.

So the next time someone says, “You’re just a sex worker,” I’ll be over here, laughing all the way to the bank in my thigh-highs.

Stay safe, Stay sexy

Your local happy hoe Beau xox
FOR: Langtrees.com

Beau Moore

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