Titty Fucking: The National Pastime Nobody Talks About
You ever notice how no one really brings up titty fucking anymore? It’s like we all agreed, silently, to put it in the same drawer as frosted tips and Nokia ringtones—something we all loved once, but pretend we’ve outgrown.
I call Bullshit.
Titty fucking is brilliant. It’s pure, uncomplicated joy. It’s not about stamina, technique, or bending into shapes that’d make a yoga instructor cry. It’s about sliding your dick between two beautiful distractions and thanking the gods you were born a mammal.
And no, you don’t need to be staring down a pair of cartoonish F-cups. That’s the biggest myth out there. I’ve had titty fucks with women who were barely a B, and let me tell you—it’s not about size. It’s about enthusiasm, attitude, and a bit of well-placed lube.
Honestly, it’s the vibe that counts.
See, when a woman gives you that look—you know the one, cheeky glint in the eye, that little grin that says, “you’re not ready for this but I’m doing it anyway”—and suddenly your cock is getting the best massage it’s had all week, there’s nothing quite like it.
And when she leans in, tongue sneaks out to tease the head, eyes locked on yours, hands squashing her tits around you like she’s trying to win a prize? That’s not just foreplay, that’s poetry.
It’s hot because it’s ridiculous. It’s intimate because it’s filthy. It’s all about mutual chaos. You both know it’s not going to lead to some massive tantric awakening. But it doesn’t need to. It’s just good, dirty, fun.
And women—don’t think you’re just passive props in this. Oh no. You’re running the whole show. You’ve got the power. You’re the director, the main star, and the fucking stage. If you’re enjoying it—if you’re into the teasing, the mess, the visual of him practically levitating—you own the room.
I once had a woman whisper, “I want to see you lose it on my chest.”
Mate, I nearly proposed. I didn’t, because I’m not a complete idiot, but it was close.
It’s not about porn moves. It’s not about perfection. Sometimes the tits don’t squish just right. Sometimes your rhythm’s off and you’re thrusting like a confused duck. That’s fine. That’s part of the charm.
And if you’re worried about looking silly—newsflash: you already do. You’re naked, you’re sweaty, and you’re sliding your dick through boobs. There’s no way that doesn’t look a little stupid. But if you’re both laughing and moaning and having a ball, who gives a shit?
It’s funny. It’s sexy. It’s real.
So yeah—bring back the titty fuck. Reclaim the throne. It’s time this underrated masterpiece got the respect it deserves. And if your partner’s never tried it, tonight’s the night. Ask with confidence. Offer to warm your hands first. Hell, make it a bonding exercise.
And if you’re reading this thinking, “God, I haven’t done that in years…” then what are you waiting for?
You don’t need a manual. You just need each other, a bit of cheek, and maybe a towel.
Author: Master Yoda
For: Langtrees.com
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“Titty fucking is all about intimacy and exploring pleasure in a fun, relaxed way. It's a playful act that can spice things up and create a deeper connection between partners. So, if you're feeling adventurous, don't hesitate to give it a try!”
“Well, you never fail to amuse me Master Yoda! Surprisingly never tried this with my man but I would surely do and share my experience as I am keen on trying after reading this!”
“I wouldn't say I was thrilled with the idea. It was more like, "Why the hell not?" Titty fucking is shockingly simple, almost as simple as giving your partner a hand or blow job. ”
“Personally, I enjoy the sensation of the penis between my boobs, not because of the activity itself, but rather because of the warmth and hardness that exists between them, as well as when he cums.”
“Finally, someone said it. Titty fucking deserves a full-blown renaissance. It’s playful, filthy, and visually delicious—an unapologetic celebration of bodies and chemistry. No pressure, no choreography, just hot, chaotic fun that thrives on connection and attitude. Pure, simple pleasure done right. Some of our ladies at Langtrees Canberra specialise in this art form, so any men in Canberra wanting to experience a truly mind blowing experience are invited to pop in and see what all this hype is about! - Another great post by Master Yoda ;) Keep up the great work.”